Dewey Nicks Is Picture Perfect in Beverly Hills

SELLER: Dewey and Stephanie Nicks
LOCATION: N. Sierra Drive, Beverly Hills, CA
PRICE: $5,625,000
SIZE: 4,429 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Perfectly designed for chic entertaining and comfortable living in the prestigious Beverly Hills flats. This stylish traditional has been recently renovated from the ground up by renowned architects Marmol & Radzinger and celebrity interior designer Brad Dunning. Garden by Chris Brock. This home has the sophistication and glamour of the Beverly Hills Hotel with the latest and greatest amenities.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Simmer down children, Your Mama knows you people probably don't have a clue who this Dewey Nicks dude is but we can assure you that if you have eyes you have seen his work. Mister Nicks is a famous (former) fashion photographer who shot photographs for prominent publications such as Vogue, Harper's Bazaar, W and our favorite for terlit room reading, Vanity Fair. He's also directed commercials for fashionista folks like Guess and Hugo Boss, made the fantastic photos for a faboo coffee table book called Kustom and he also directed the film Slackers. So he may not be a real live celebrity in the classic sense of the word, but he certainly plays in the same sandbox. Okaaay?

Plus, Man and Wifey Nicks are selling their celebrity style house in Beverly Hills that has been done up by architecture hotshots Marmol & Radziner with a wacky, whimsical but still quite taut interior worked over hard (HARD!) by mucketymuck decorator Brad Dunning. The much lauded Mister Dunning–who has nipped and tucked the living quarters of such luminaries Tom Ford, filmmakers Sofia Coppola and Spike Jonz (back when they were coupled), and Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher–was IT for Los Angeles based interior designers before that Kelly Wearstler gal scooted on to the scene and became Tinseltown's shiniest decorative darling with her far-out fashion ways, imaginative hair-dos and Hollywood Regency style resurgence.

Anyhoo, Mister and Missus Nicks have listed their N. Sierra Drive home in the Bev Hills flats with an asking price of $5,625,000. Property records show that the aesthetically minded pair purchased the 4,429 square foot house in December of 2002 for $2,195,000 and listing information reveals the house includes just three bedrooms, four bathrooms, 2 fireplaces and a detached 2 car garage at the rear of the property.

Now listen puppies, Your Mama is feeling particularly long winded this morning, so get your self a stiff cappuccino, a stiffer bloody mary or whatever it is that gets you through the early a.m. hours and let's have a walk through this updated and upgraded mini-manse in Beverly Hills and hit some of the high and low points, shall we?

The traditional front facade has been meticulously maintained, fits into the neighborhood like it always has and offers no suggestion that the interior spaces are vibrantly colorful, funky fine and, for better or worse, an apex of contemporary and eclectic interior day-core as defined by all the gleaming shelter rags. In the foyer, with it's girlish pink paint and curvaceous, dazzling and dangerous for drunks staircase, someone clearly took a lesson about picture hanging from the dee-voon decorating demon who did up deceased doyenne Brooke Astor's exquisite Holly Hill estate just north of New York City

Much brainstorming, energy and, of course, money was spent to impress-the-guests in the powder room where we find ornaments and oddities we've never actually seen in a guest terlit including an occasional table and lamp for mood lighting, a trapezoidal mirror, high-priced objet d'art and a fish tank built right into the damn wall. This fish tank was, apparently, purposely placed level with the eyeballs of whomever sits on the campy jet black terlit. Now children, it does look sort of, uhm beguiling, don't it? However, it's entirely gratuitous, distracting from the matters at hand, quite frankly, reminds Your Mama too much of the orthodontist office where Sister Woman went to get her teeth tortured into submission back in the 1980s.

We'll pass on discussing the lemon yellow living room other than to say that we sincerely hope someone in this household plays that gigantic grand piano. Otherwise, it's just an uppity artifice that serves no purpose other than to not very discreetly inform your maid and your guests that you are so fucking rich that you can afford to fork over $75,000 or more for a glossy Steinway and not even play the damn thing.

Let's move into the dining room which, we freely admit, we love. Mostly. Mister Dunning's dining room do over day-core is so absurdly old school and high camp that it will always manage to look timeless. If Your Mama told you this room was done back in 1962, wouldn't you believe us? We are simply swooning over the tangerine colored rug (we love almost anything orange), we think the tur-qwahze seat cushions were an inspired choice and, surprisingly, we're even digging the wrap around wall mural even though we seldom think a wall mural a good idea. None the less, we do find a few chinks in the exquisite armor. Far be it from Your Mama to question the sagacious and sophisticated Mister Dunning, but we have to be honest–because we always are–and say that it is our humble and entirely meaningless opinion that the antique glass chandelier is not only too diminutive for the room, but it appears to be hung a wee bit too high. We think chandeliers should be out and proud, not a shy and demure damsel as this one appears to be.

The family room/den/office/boob-toob room is probably where Mister and Missus Nicks actually live as opposed to entertain. While we do like the orange and red patterned carpeting (there's our love of orange again), and we appreciate how it's the only pattern in the room but we do worry that it might prove frustrating first thing in the morning before we've managed to bring our bleary eyes into proper focus. On the other hand, that gigantic chocolate brown velvet sofa looks pleasantly long enough for both your Mama and the Dr. Cooter to lay down at the same time while watching those unnerving beehawchas on the Bravo's The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Note the book shelves with actual books.

We have no serious beef with the modest sized kitchen with its simple white cabinets (sporting the very same nipple-like pulls as Your Mama and the Doctor Cooter had in our kitchen on the East Coast), Carrara marble counter tops and massive Mac Daddy Viking Range that is bigger than one of those cute little Smart Cars. Unfortunately, the breakfast room pushes the irony envelope too far for our personal taste, although we do appreciate its relationship to the rear patio and we recognize and acknowledge the delicious tension created by those Shaker style stools pulled up to the breakfast bar.

Upstairs, the mammoth master suite features a fantastic Lucite four poster bed, baby blue and orange linens (there's the orange again) and plenty of floor space for yoga on the unfortunate yellow plaid carpeting which does nothing for us but make us dizzy. The table-cloth like carpet has been pulled into the large dressing closet that includes a cute little oval window. The large but fairly non-descript master bath has plenty of storage space for all the anti-aging creams a ladee can buy. We appreciate the burst of color the three fuchsia orchids provide, but honestly, we find orchids to be such a tired and over-used cliché in upscale day-core. They are orchids, right?

We included a photo of one of the guest rooms simply because Your Mama has a special affection for toile and this room is practically drowning in toile. Plus we love how Mister Dunning inserted those modern orb lamps sitting on the side tables. We do not care for the caca colored carpeting and we wonder what would happen if Mister Dunning had placed some reading material in the side tables and then jumped right over the toile cliff and covered the bed with the stuff too. If you're gonna do it, why not really do it, right?

The backyard features a charming brick terrace shaded by a retractable striped awning over looking the petite lawn area and heated swimming pool. Someone try to tell us that this isn't the perfect spot to spend the afternoon sipping gin and tonics, reading the gossip glossies and feeling superior to all those poor people who can't afford a five+ million dollar house in the Bev Hills flats. Be assured children, that patio furniture cost more than your car.

We already know some of you are going to scream, shout, holler and spit all manner of piss and vinegar about how this house is an over-processed hot mess. And it would be...for most people. However, whether it's the right style for you or not, one has to admit (or at least we do), it's quite compelling, visually startling in a (mostly) good way, not particularly precious despite it's obvious expense and self-consciousness and, ultimately, a very livable abode.