Afternoon Delight: Petra Ecclestone

In case any of y'all ain't seen it yet, the fashion industry bible known as W recently published a lengthy article pun-ishly entitled Lady of the Manor about Formula One racing heiress Petra Ecclestone and the newly overhauled 56,500 square foot Los Angeles, CA mega-mansion she snatched up last summer from wealthy Tinseltown widow Candy Spelling for a throat-tightening $85,000,000.

We're gonna discuss the article a bit here because we thought it was high-larious and just can't resist. However, Your Mama suggests all y'all scoot on over to W and read the entire thing because it'll be damn delicious to anyone who has any interest at all in the lifestyle of an exceptionally pampered 23-year old heiress with seemingly unlimited access to a multi-billion dollar fortune.

Out, the article's writer Dana Goodyear reveals, went all Miz Spelling's chintz-y, Rich-But-Boring-Grandma day-core and replaced with "dark velvets" and "little crystals." Gone is the gift wrapping room, now an office for Miss Ecclestone's assistant. And away went Miz Spellings (in)famous and—let's be honest—freaky-deaky doll museum, replaced by a fully-equipped spa facility outfitted with massage parlor, three hair stations, and two mani-pedi chairs.

Upstairs there remain six "enormous" family/guest suites and a master suite Miz Goodyear pegs at an astonishing and all but unfathomable 7,000 square feet. The mansion-sized master suite contains, as per the article, a living room, bedroom, kitchen, his and her bathrooms and his and her walk-in closet/dressing rooms, the hers of which is described by Miz Goodyear as having a pair of glass-topped center islands, a second floor accessible by not one, children, but two staircases, and plenty of shelf space for Miss Ecclestone's epic, multi-colored collection of 25 Birkin bags.

Miss Ecclestone, now toiling as a handbag designer for her own label, shares her newly redone Holmby Hills residence, described by Miz Goodyear as all dolled up like a "massive VIP lounge," with a pack of pure bred dogs and her 30-year old husband of six months James Stunt. Mister Stunt, Miss Ecclestone told Miz Goodyear, "owns gold mines," which, she went on to say, is "very random."

Only about a year before dropping 85 million big ones on her Los Angeles residence Miss Ecclestone plunked down a staggering $87 million (or thereabouts) on a 20,000 square foot Grade II listed spread in London's Cheslea 'hood.

Now then, with that as an appetizer, get on over to W and get the rest of the juicy details that will surely make any number of the children drool with envy, foam with righteous anger, or both.