A Shabby Chic Pad for Peri Gilpin

BUYER: Peri Gilpin
SELLER: Rachel Ashwell
LOCATION: Malibu, CA
PRICE: $3,550,000
SIZE: 1,783 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Last week the gal at the L.A. Times reported that She-ra of Shabby Chic Rachel Ashwell sold her land side beach house inside the guarded gates of the celebrity packed Malibu Colony community. Miss Ashwell is, for those ignorant of 1980s decorating trends, the gal who popularized what Your Mama calls "Grandma Sheek," a distinct decorative style that incorporates lots of white slip-covered sofas, chenille bedspreads, country cute-cute vintage linens, heavily distressed bureaus and side tables, and shimmery chandeliers for a soupçon of glamor and shine.

What Miss L.A. Times celebrity real estate reporter did not reveal is the big name buyer who forked over a few million clams for the Miss Ashwell's cottage in The Colony. According to our wonderfully well connected informant The Mistress of Maleeboo–and confirmed with a very roundabout tour through property records–the buyer is gravel voiced actress Peri Gilpin of Fraser fame and her artist huzband Christian Vincent who should absolutely not to be mistaken with hard-bodied dancer/actor Christian Vincent.

Listing information shows Miss Ashwell's Colony cottage was first listed at the beginning of March of 2010 and property records show that the deal closed quickly in early July for $3,550,000. A few quick flicks of the well worn beads of Your Mama's bejeweled abacus shows that the purchase price is $875,000–a not insignificant 20%–less than She-ra of Shabby Chic's original asking price of $4,425,000.

Miss Ashwell bought the beach house in February of 2003 for $1,950,000 and while we presume she occupied the cottage herself at times, it's well established (and oft reported) that she frequently leased the home to celebs. A few of the Tinseltown hoity-toities who dumped big bucks to lease Miss Ashwell's Shabby Chic beach house include back in the saddle pop star Britney Spears who lived there during her pre-meltdown/party with Paris Hilton days, busty party princess Pam Anderson who is known among Colonyites for handing out perfectly packaged caramel apples in their own individually wrapped containers at Halloween, and the dee-voon actress Mariska Hargitay who appeared for years and years and years one of those damn Law & Order programs and who, according to the Mistress of Maleeboo, took up residence in Miss Ashwell's cottage in The Colony while she was preggers in 2006 with her baby boy.

Listing information and most previous reports indicate the modestly sized cottage measures 1,783 square feet and has a total 4 bedrooms and 4 poopers including a master suite with office area and private pooper. There is also a separate 1 bedroom and 1 pooper guest room that opens into the front garden through a Dutch door.

A lavender lined brick pathway leads from the entry gate and two-car garage, through the grassy and rose bush filled front yard and to the front door. Luscious limestone floors have been laid throughout the main living areas of the updated and upgraded but still rough around the edges cottage. The living/dining room has a fireplace and a wall of wood-framed sliding glass doors that open to the backyard, and the kitchen, all white cabinetry, open shelving and Viking brand appliances, is separated from a family room area by a breakfast counter. It's not known whether Miss Gilpin plans to retain the tired ol' Shabby Chic day-core or if–as Your Mama hopes–she'll tinker it into something a little less decoratively cliche.

The backyard, which has lovely views of the mountains that spill down to the ocean's edge and backs up to media mogul Jerry Perenchio's privately owned golf course, consists almost entirely of a large brick terrace shaded by mature trees and ringed by thick foliage. In one corner of the yard, pushed up against the house in the most upsetting and undignified manner is one of those above-ground, plug-in spa contraptions in which some people–including the Dr. Cooter and his cold-blooded sister Tee-Tee–enjoy settin' in what amounts to a boiling vat of their own filth and call it relaxing. No thank you, ma'am.

Property records show that Miss Gilpin and her huzband sold a house in West Hollywood back in 2003 for $1,367,000 and another house on Bowmont Drive in Beverly Hills in March of 2007 for $5,600,000 but the real estate trail goes dead there and Your Mama freely confesses that we don't know where Miss Gilpin and Mister Vincent currently live.

The Colony has a long, long, looooong history of celebrity residents A short list of past and current property owners with recognizable names include Barbara Stanwyk, Gloria Swanson, Jim Carrey, Tom Hanks, Sting and Trudie Styler–who at one point leased their home to Leo DiCaprio, Linda Ronstadt, Roma Downey and Mark Burnett, Mel Brooks, Brian Grazer, Cicely Tyson, Rob Reiner, Jeff Bridges, Paul Reiser, Jason Statham, Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen, Ridley Scott, Eric Roth, Pam Anderson who is allegedly going broke due an extensive and expensive remodel of her land side property, and media mogul Jerry Perenchio owns at least a dozen homes in The Colony as well as the aforementioned private golf course that sits discreetly between The Colony and the Pacific Coast Highway. One of the current Colonyites is Miss Gilpin's former co-star, b.f.f., and bizness partner Jane Leeves (Fraser, Hot in Cleveland) who has spent the last few years re-working her inland Colony getaway into a big yellow monster.

Like many rich and (quasi) famous types in LaLa Land, Miss Ashwell seems to be on a constant real estate merry-go-round. In the early 1990s she quit-claimed an ocean front house on Carbon Beach to her now ex-husband artist/commercial director David Ashwell, and in May of 1998 she paid $1,050,00 for a inland side house in The Colony that she sold in September of 2002 for $2,200,000.

In August of 2004 she scooped up a perfectly private 3,119 square foot house on Westgate Avenue in the Brentwood area of Los Angeles for $3,170,000. Then, in October of 2007, according to property records, the Shabby Chic She-ra dumped $4,150,000 on a 5 bedroom and 3 pooper residence located just behind the Brentwood Country Mart where scads of stars such as Reese Witherspoon and Jennifer Garner come to shop and nosh. In July of 20o9, presumably after completing a re-do of her new house behind the Brentwood Country Mart, Miss Ashwell sold her Westgate Avenue property to a cardiologist and a pediatrician for $2,824,400 after listing it 10 months earlier with a much higher asking price of $4,395,000.

listing photos: Pritchett & Rapf via Redfin.

Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen Put Their Malibu Colony House on the Block

SELLERS: Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen
LOCATION: Malibu Colony Road, Malibu, CA
PRICE: $18,5000,000
SIZE: 2,963 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Situated in a gated enclave on one of SoCal's most coveted beaches, this recently remodeled (2002) 5 bed, 5.5 bat retreat excels at entertaining. Open, yet intimate conversation areas, bathed in light, define the 1st floor living areas. Sparkling ktch w/TOL appliances & ample storage space. The ocnfront mster incs. romantic f/p, sun deck, walk-in closet & luxe bath area, each addtn'l br features custom finishes & bath areas w/waterworks tile & fixtures. Spacious 2nd flr family/gathering/ofc rm. Rare!

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Not only are we going to stay in Malee-bee this morning, Your Mama is going to stick with another cast member of the Cheers juggernaut. Lawhd children, we should all be so lucky to have a piece of the syndication rights of Cheers. For many years before and after the show came to an end, the re-runs could not be escaped on the boob-tube. Your Mama recalls a time not so long ago when we could not turn on the television without seeing that depressing basement bar in Boston.

Ted Danson, the over sexed ladies man owner of the bar, has long since moved beyond his role as Sam Malone on Cheers, and has had starring roles on Ink, a program Your Mama has never heard of, a long stretch as a bitter doctor on Becker, and most recently on Help Me Help You, where he plays a pompous psychiatrist with a lot of issues.

Danson's wifey is the Oscar winning actor Mary Steenburgen, who manages to work a lot without becoming food for the tabloid grist mill. See babies, it really is possible to be a successful and famous actor who lives in Los Angeles and not have the paps tailing you all the time as you speed down Sunset Boulevard on the way to Kitson.

Anyhoo, back in 1999, a few years after the couple married, they sold an ocean front house on Victoria Point Road in Malee-boo to actor Michael Madsen who recently lost the house in foreclosure. Wig wearing Ted and Miss Mary parlayed that investment into some prime Malee-boo real estate in October of 2000 when they purchased another ocean front house in The Colony, the unfathomably expensive guard gated enclave of the rich and famous.

The property records we access to do not indicate what amount they paid for the property. However, we do know the house next door sold at just about the same time for just over $4.7 million. So we can all sleep well at night knowing toupé Ted and Miss Mary will make millions on the sale of the house, which is currently listed at a mind altering $18,500,000.

For those not familiar with The Colony, the houses are smashed up next to each other on narrow and tiny lots where windows sometimes look into the windows of the neighbors' houses. Think about it. Even with clever landscaping and hedging, living in The Colony means paying $18,500,000 for a house that is so close to the next house that you might be able to see your middle aged, fat ass neighbor with a hairy back slathering cocoa butter on the 22 year old hussy with plastic boobs that he picked up the night before. And really, who needs to see that?

According to the listing information, the house underwent a renovation in 2002 and the the results are clearly stunning. Now children, the decor here is decidedly not what Your Mama would do with an ocean front house in The Colony, but it's tough to beef with what appears to be excellent taste.

The casually elegant interiors do in fact look put your feet on the sofa comfortable, but we do imagine the maid goes nuts trying to keep those glossy wood floors from getting scraped and scratched from sand tracked in from the beach.

Although we don't care for the topiary in the living room or the county style table and chairs in the family room area, we pee our pants with glee over the long, long kitchen. The all-white kitchen with the subway tile looks pleasingly antiseptic and appropriate for a room where one pounds tenderloin and beats eggs. The 72" Viking range has us screaming at the top of our lungs with envy. The Dr. Cooter and Your Mama got a Viking too, but not one as big as a Cadillac like we see here.

The property records indicate the house is just under 3,000 square feet, but looking at the pictures and the listing, which states there are 5 bedrooms and 5.5 bathrooms, it's tough to believe the accuracy of that number.

The Danson / Steenburgen duo also own a large house on S. Burlingame Avenue in Brentwood. The 6,718 squre foot, 5 bedroom, 5 bathroom house, purchased in May of 2002 for $3,657,5000, is not the only house on S. Burlingame Avenue the couple has owned.

In in September of 1998 the couple bought 162 S. Burlingame Avenue for $3,525,000 but quickly sold the 8,000+ square foot in May 1999 for $3,623,500. And in December of 2005, they sold the 5,509 square foot house at 226 S. Burlingame for an undisclosed sum of money. The couple appears to have purchased that house in October of 1995 for $2,995,000.

The powerhouse acting pair also have a couple of houses on Martha's Vineyard. Property records indicate they have owned one of the houses, which measures 3,935 square foot, 5 bedroom, 4.5 bathrooms, since at least 1998. Then in May of 20o2 they purchased the house next door for $3,850,000, presumably for privacy and family use.

Your Mama hasn't a clue where these two will buy next, but we can't imagine after years of owning ocean front homes in the area that they'll stray too far from the sacred sands of Malee-boo.

UPDATE: The couple sold the house in the summer of 2008 for $15,500,000.