Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Brian Grazer in Malee-boo

BUYER: Brian Grazer and Gigi Levangie Grazer
LOCATION: Malibu Colony, Malibu, CA
PRICE: $16,000,000 (list)
SIZE: 6,067 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: One of a kind 3-story Mediterranean villa situated on the sand in the exclusive gated community of Malibu Colony. Master bedroom has a terrace and separate sitting room with full ocean view. Dual bathrooms, dry sauna, private indoor heated lap pool and spa. Elevator. Perfect entertaining home.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Back in September of 2003 when Mister and Missus Brian Grazer were happily married, they purchased a large ocean front house in the swanky guard gated Malibu Colony. Property records to not indicate a purchase price, however the house was listed at $16,000,000 and back in 2003 the market was so scorching it was burning people in Arizona, so we suspect and speculate that the Grazers paid close to asking, and we would not be surprised to know they paid more than asking.

Y'all know who Brian Grazer is, right? That's right, he's the spiky haired, enormously successful film and television super-producer who founded Imagine Entertainment with pal and bizness partner Ron Howard. In addition to acting as the executive producer for boob tube hit 24 and the ill-fated Arrested Development, Grazer also produced the Russell Crow vehicle A Beautiful Mind, and Tom Hanks vehicles Apollo 13 and The Da Vinci Code.

Anyhoo, earlier today we discussed the stupendous Pacific Palisades house the Grazers have recently put on the market for $27,500,000 and we figured we'd do a double whammy and post a few snaps of the Grazer's Malibu Colony beach house. As far as we know, the house is not currently for sale, but given the Grazers look like they're headed for dee-vorce court, the listing could pop up any day.

Long gone are the days when rich folks were happy with a shack on the beach that provided shelter from the sun, a shower to rinse off the saltwater, and a stove for boiling up the lobster. Nowadays super rich Malee-booans want all the same lavish luxuries and amenities in their disconcertingly expensive ocean front retreats as they do in their primary residences located less than 20 miles away. Case in point, the Grazer beach house with a swimming pool in the basement.

The Grazer's house stands three stories tall with garaging for three cars which is extremely valuable in a community with a serious shortage of parking for residents and their lucky guests who are privilaged enough to pass through the hallowed gates.

The basement level offers utility rooms, a bedroom or two and unexpectedly, a heated swimming pool. Your Mama knows the Pacific is cold enough to shrivel the naughty bits in seconds, but we still find it extravagant and excessive to have a lap pool in the basement of an ocean front house. Somehow it's both incongruous and unseemly.

The third floor den has a fireplace and spectacular views of some of the most exclusive sand in the world. Fortunately the house has an elevator, otherwise Your Mama would never be able to haul our big ass up that high to see the nice view.

If any of you children are ever lucky enough to get on the sand out in front of the Colony, you'd be able to spot the Grazer house by the sea of red umbrellas that dot the small backyard and sun deck.

The house is located on one of the larger ocean side lots in the Malibu Colony which we're sure y'all recall is where Miss Britney Spears caused a kerfuffle when she rented shabby chic queen Rachel Aswell's house after she first fled her Malee-boo marital house of horrors up the road in the Serra Retreat. Other Colony residents with big names and big pocketbooks include Tom Hanks, Sting and Trudie Styler, Jim Carrey, and aging sex pot and notorious beach bunny Pamela Anderson, who had her garden side house on the market last year for $6,500,000 until she rented it to Billy Bob Thornton's ex-wife Pietra.

Your Mama would like to say that we hope the Grazers are able to work their way through their issues and dee-vorce with grace, dignity, and mutual respect. Dee-vorce ain't easy, especially when there are such tremendous assets involved.

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