Friday, October 23, 2009

Is Another Real Housewife Biting the Real Estate Dust?

All the children know that Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter are unrepentant reality tee-vee junkies who will watch just about anything short of programs that feature former celebrities attempting to grab 10 more minutes of their former fame and glory or even worse, those who are despereate for a paycheck. Those programs, like I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here, are simply too sad to watch. One of our most beloved guilty pleasures is The Real Housewives of... franchise on the Bravo channel. We just can't seem to get enough of all those nipped and tucked boojie behawtchas getting into the most ridiculous and petty grade school gurl cat fights. It's all kinds of ugly children, but it's good ugly. Like the Jerry Springer Show only with expensive clothes and jewelry.

The notch in Andy Cohen's reality tee-vee belt is The Real Housewives of New Jersey. While each of the five "housewives" in Jersey were jaw dropping and eye popping in their own way, it was fiery tempered table flipper Teresa Giudice who rocketed to pinnacle of reality tee-vee fame for coining the brilliant put down, "prostitution whore"–which Your Mama uses all the damn time–and for humping around town with a house cat sized wad of cash in her purse. Do y'all remember that episode where she swanned around some furniture warehouse on some turnpike bragging about how she always paid cash for everything while peeling off more than $120,360 to buy a lot of ugly furniture for her ugly new house?

As it turns out and despite that flagrant and vulgar display, Teresa and her huzband Giuseppe–a.k.a. Joe–did not pay cash for a piece of property they own in nearby Lincoln Park, NJ because according to recent reports, the self-proclaimed all cash couple failed to make the mortgage payments on the .47 acre piece of land. Missus Giudice–which Your Mama thinks is pronounced either joo-duh-say or gwee-dee-chee–owes $127,500 on the property and the peeps at the DLJ Mortgage Company want their money or they're going to move to foreclose on the property according to papers filed with the New Jersey Superior Court.

It appears the couple's newly built onyx and marble monstrosity on Indian Lane in Towaco, NJ–which, by the way, backs up to the very bizzy and very loud Interstate 287–is not about to be foreclosed as was reported far and wide earlier today. However, a peep and a poke around the public property records reveals that the couple also carry a hefty, $1,720,000 mortgage on their 10,000+ square foot manse which means they didn't pay cash for that property either which kinda makes Missus Giudice a big fat fibber.

No doubt there is more to this story than meets Your Mama's gin soaked eyes and we're sure Mister and Missus Giudice will soon issue a press release saying it was all a paperwork mix up or some such nonsense. In the meantime, Your Mama is crossing our fingers and toes that the Giudice's real estate dra-muh is captured for the next season of the New Jersey installment of Andy Cohen's reality tee-vee baby.

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