Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Kate Moss Has a Basement Full of Crap

Catwalker Kate Moss is having a bad month.

Last week a gang of thieves broke into her house in London's well heeled St. John's Wood area and absconded with a trio of art pieces including a portrait by the somewhat mysterious graffiti artist Banksy reported to be worth over $115,000. Miss Moss, her daughter, her mother, and her musician man-friend Jamie Hince were all in the house sleeping when the burglary occurred but no one, as far and Your Mama knows, was bothered or busted up by the burglars. Fortunately for her, a 24 year old believed to be connected to the break in has been arrested.

The next bedevilment to befall the manikin was a malfunctioning basement pump that flooded the lower level of her home with raw sewage, untreated liquid waste that can contain so many unsavory things we can't bear to mention them. Lo-ward have mercy children, just the thought of that much terlit waste sloshing around the house is enough to make Your Mama gag and grab a nerve pill.

In addition to some household appliances and pricey rugs, the severely unsanitary and often hazardous material reportedly wrecked and ruined some furniture, a few photographs by legendary lens man Mario Testino, and Miss Moss's shoe collection, which you know was extensive, valuable, and fa-bew-lus.

Just to add insult to Miss Moss's month of vexation and exasperation, no one was willing to cough up the minimum bid for a group of nekkid portraits of the celery stalk thin model by photographer Albert Watson that recently came up for auction at Christie's. The enlarged contact sheet was expected to sell for between $29,000 and $43,000. But alas....

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