Thursday, March 1, 2007
The Red Hot House of Anthony Kiedis
SELLER: Anthony Kiedis
LOCATION: Davis Drive, Beverly Hills, CA
SIZE: 4,294 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 6 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: On one of the rare 3 acre knolls in BHPO, this tour de force celeb property is Tuscan in style, w/ panoramic vus from every vantage point yet accomplishing privacy. 5 bedrooms, 6 bathrooms, 6 fireplaces, roman pool and spar and spectacular indoor/outdoor flow, Bell tower, grand cordon bleu kitchen w/ sweeping views, large scale ceiling heights and one of the most romantic master suites in Southern Cal. A breathtaking opportunity to purchase this beautiful villa near the best of everything Beverly Hills has to offer.
YOUR MAMAS NOTES: If Your Mama is being honest with the children, we would tell you we done peed our pants when we came across this house. The listing for this house proudly declares it's celebrity ownership. However, property records do not list anybody famous. After some investigation, and a call to one of Your Mama's well connected little spies in the Bev Hills, we have been able to determine that this house does indeed belong to Anthony Kiedis, the sexed up front man for The Red Hot Chili Peppers.
He may have been born in Michigan, but Kiedis is pure Los Angeles rock star, right down to the red string he's been wearing around his wrist lately. That's right hunnies, kabbalah. Do the kabbalists have a celebrity center like those Scientologist people?
Mister Kiedis' reputation as a lady lover is legendary. In addition to all the no-name tartlets and groupies, there was Ione Skye, teeny tiny Sofia Coppola, big tall Heidi Klum, and even the bawl-headed Sinéad O'Conner just to name a few. But, according to a recent article in Blender, there's a new gurl, a much, much younger gurl in this rock star's life that has him wanting to settle down and make babies.
This tattooed 44-year old hot rod with the jaw dropping body of a 26 year old recently begun co-habitating with "model" Heather Christie. Heather recently turned 20 years old. Old enough to vote, but not old enough to drink in a bar. It's really such a cliche isn't it? Aging rock star dating a "model" who is just out of her teens. Your Mama wishes these two well. We do. But babies, if you're reading this, Your Mama recommends waiting a year or two before producing progeny. Don't act ignorant with Your Mama, you know why we suggest you wait. Please don not go birthing babies just to prove you have conquered your demons and are prepared to be a daddy and a teenage mother. It's all about the children.
Kiedis only purchased this house in June of 2004. Your Mama thinks he paid around $4,800,000. Don't go blabbing that number to yer friends or the press, because the property records are a bit vague so we aren't positive that's accurate. We can only speculate on why Kiedis is selling this magnificent house. Your Mama suspects it may have something to do with the teenage girlfriend not wanting to live up in a house that has even a whisper of Kiedis' extremely active bachelorhood. Why else would a man move from a house he bought through a trust called Happy House?
One of the features Your Mama likes best about his house is it's tremendous privacy and security which makes it the perfect home for a seclusion seeking celebrity. The house, located on a dead end road up above Benedict Canyon and tucked into the hillside, can not be seen from the street. So don't any of you music psychos be thinking you can drive up into the hills and spot these two sunning themselves by the pool.
Another interesting feature of the house (not shown in the photos) is a bell tower which Kiedis and his gay decorator have thoughtfully kitted out with a bunch of velvet floor pillows. More romantic types will find it a perfect place to make love while being caressed by the warm Santa Anas. But not Your Mama. We prefer our intimate moments take place behind closed doors in a dark room, but that's another topic altogether.
Anyhoo, there is little Your Mama does not like about this property. We love all the nooks, crannies, courtyards and outdoor hiding places. Even though a forest must be felled to keep them fired up all winter, we go weak in the knees over the six fireplaces. The master bathroom has a lovely one, but Your Mama particularly covets the outdoor fireplace. We love us an outdoor room. We also appreciate that there are enough terlits for six people, but we do worry about the maid getting carpal tunnel from scrubbing them things all the time.
Mister Kiedis clearly hired a nice gay decorator to come up in here. And if you ask Your Mama, a most excellent job was done. This house manages to be decorated to within an inch of it's life and still look like a place that people actually live. Not an easy trick for sure.
The only thing we noted as questionable on this property was in the kitchen. We are surprised to find such an ordinary and inexpensive refrigerator. Given the very high quality of the materials and workmanship of this house, we expected a Sub Zero. But that's a minor and easily remedied issue.
Normally Your Mama finds a few unsavory touches in a house and rips them to shreds. But seriously folks, that would be criminal here. This house is just too damn nice. Your Mama is going to make a prediction here...this house will be purchased by another celebrity. Can't you see Sharon Stone living up in this crib? We hear pin thin Nicole Richie and Good Charlotte rocker Joel Madden are house hunting for a love nest. If we were their real estate agent, we'd be taking them here for sure.
Sources: Rolling Stone, Blender