Monday, April 7, 2008

A Little Morning Mish Mash

Your Mama has been swamped and ka-razy short on time so we're going to take advantage of this quiet morning to catch up on some of the items we've not previously had a chance to discuss. If y'all already know some or all of this real estate bizness, well then don't read it. And don't complain. We do not want to hear it. We're doing the best we can at a time when we've got more to do than there are hours in the day. Besides, we got some good stuff to serve up for you later.

Looks like television writer and producer Mark Brazill (That 70s Show, 3rd Rock from the Sun) is already selling the lovely Los Feliz residence he purchased in April of 2007 for $4,795,000 from the always meticulously groomed pop super star Gwen Stefani and her meretricious musician huzband Gavin Rossdale. Mister Brazill, a man arguably best known by the general public for his frightening email exchanges with film and television writer Judd Apatow, recently dropped the 5 bedroom and 4 bathroom stunner on Aberdeen Drive back on the market for $4,885,000, an asking price which pretty much guarantees that once all the taxes and big fat real estate fees are paid, the bombastic Brazill will be losing major money on this real estate folly.

Mister Brazill also had a Toluca Lake property on the market late last year for $3,900,000. Property records reveal that house was sold in February of 2008 for $2,850,000, a somewhat shocking million clams less than he was hoping to get, a situation that Your Mama hopes did not lead a barrage of potty mouth and deeply disturbing emails to real estate agents and attorneys.

Thank Jeezis or Krishna or whatever darned diety you bow down to that funny actress and new mommy Jaime Pressly, who so lovingly and soo-blimely plays an angry, addled and gum snapping piece of trailer trash on My Name is Earl, may have finally got her Buddha filled digs in Tarzana sold.

After nearly a year of fussing, fretting and a major karate chop to the asking price (from $1,499,000 to $1,299,000), listing information for the 2,955 square foot Rosita Street house is currently marked "Looking for a Back Up" which usually indicates the house has gone into escrow. Yippee! Your Mama asks all the children cross their fingers and toes in an effort to send positive vibes towards keeping this deal stuck together so that babalicious behawtcha can get all them Buddha statues loaded up and moved on.

Blondie and her baby daddy, DJ Eric Cubiche, have already forked over $2,250,000 for a large, generic and newly built Mediterranean-ish style mansion on Woodcliff Road in Sherman Oaks which must make the desire to sell the Rosita Street house even more intense.

Who doesn't love Shannen Doherty with her Picasso worthy face and colorful off-set antics? The dark haired and sometimes temperamental Miss Doherty shot to the pinnacle of boob toob fame as bitchy Brenda Walsh on Beverly Hills 90210, then went on to three years as a good witch on Charmed, and more recently hosted some unscripted nonsense called Breaking Up With Shannen Doherty.

Now babies, everyone knows Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter are reality television junkies. However, even we have to draw the line somewhere and that line sits this side of watching Miss Doherty bust up couples on national T.V. Holy moly children, what fool would agree to sign a waiver to be seen on a show like that? Honestly! Are people so hungry for their 15 minutes they'd happily humiliate themselves and air their dirty laundry on national damn T.V.? It would appear so. Lawhd children, what is this world coming to?

Anyhoo, we're here to discuss celebrity real estate and not upsetting cultural phenomena, so let's get back on topic. Your Mama always thought Miss Doherty shacked up with a few horses and dogs on a 20 acre ranch in Somis, a little known and dusty town north of Los Angeles in Ventura County. However, property records show she has sold that rural retreat some time ago and, as it turns out, Miss Doherty actually owns two house in Malee-boo. Two!

One of them, located on Winding Way, was recently listed with an asking price of $4,400,000. Property records reveal that Miss Doherty paid $2,560,000 for the 5 bedroom and 4.5 bathroom property in April of 2004 and listing information indicates the 3,410 square foot contemporary house is accessed down a long flower lined driveway which terminates in a large motor court perfect for turning giant SUVs. The backyard swimming pool looks out and over some of the most expensive real estate in Malee-boo to the Pacific Ocean, a view that Your Mama would give our eye teeth for.

Your Mama hasn't a clue where Miss Doherty will park it once this property sells, but she does still own that another house in Malee-boo, so none of the bleeding heart children should lose any sleep about the possibility of her being homeless.

As was first reported in Life & Style magazine some time ago and built on by the on fire with 411 Mister Big Time yesterday, the always hatted country music star Kenny Chesney has recently plunked down a hefty $7,400,000 for a comely casa on celebrity studded Carbon Mesa Road in Malee-boo.

Mister Chesney's Mediterranean style mini-manse, located up a long private celebrity style driveway, features just 2 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms, an infinity edged swimming pool overlooking the Pacific Ocean, and a long stretch of lawn perfect for gin soaked croquet tournaments played at twilight.

Other big name residents on Carbon Mesa Road include (but are not limited to) Tanya Tucker, Ed Harris and Amy Madigan, David Duchovny and Tea Leoni, as well as the now vacant lot where a house owned by Sean Penn was burned to the ground in the 1993 Malibu fires.

Property records show that Mister Chesney, who was once married to Oscar winning actress Renee Zellweger for about 12 minutes, also owns a 48 acre farm outside Nashville in Franklin, TN. But what Your Mama really wants to know is what is (or is not) under Mister Chesney's 10 gallon hat?

Celebrity real estate superstar Max Abelson at the NY Observer reported yesterday that U2 front man and budding political bigwig Bono pulled in $4,900,000 for an 2,322 square foot co-op apartment he recently sold an apartment at the legendary El Dorado on New York City's Central Park West, the same dee-luxe building where Moby the musician is getting antsy to unload his glute grueling quadraplex.

But don't get too excited children, because this is not the apartment where He of the Tinted Lenses actually lives. Five years ago the Irish rock star moved a few blocks south to the swanky San Remo where he paid Apple Founder and CEO Steve Jobs $14,500,000 for a sprawling duplex penthouse. The San Remo digs are where Mister Bono reportedly coughed up an additional $15,000,000 on renovations by starchitects I.M. Pei and Robert A.M. Stern and also where he has famously battled with Billy Squier (and other nabes) over fireplace smoke drifting into his penthouse.

No comments:

Post a Comment