Friday, April 25, 2008

Your Mama Hears...

...from A Girl Named Ted that pop starlet slash new mommy Christina Aguilera and her music executive huzband Jordan Bratman have quietly put their former residence on Devlin Drive in the Hollywood Hills on the market with a $7,995,000 price tag.

If the children put on their thinking caps, they will recall that in August of 2007 Mister and Missus Bratman made the rather unexpected choice to fork over $11,500,000 for the 11,571 square foot Bev Hills mansion of Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne. Perhaps Miss X-Tina was drawn to all the religious iconography carved into the doors and floors? Maybe she liked the gated motor court where they can unload baby Bratman from their gas guzzling white Rolls Royce without being photographed? Or maybe they are just not bothered by buses that roll slowly by while tourists act foolish and hang out of windows snap, snap, snapping with their Leicas? Who knows?

Anyhoo, property records reveal that Miss Aguilera purchased the Steve Hermann designed digs at the top of Devlin Drive in April of 2003 for an undisclosed sum of money although reports from the time indicate it was around $5,000,000. We've also heard from A Girl Named Ted that Miss Courtney Cox looked at this place before it was quickly snatched up–furniture and all–by Miss X-Tina. Prior to Mister Herman giving the place an overhaul, the Devlin Drive house was owned by producer Jack Haley Jr., who is perhaps better known in some circles for having once been married to the lovable show bizness train wreck that is Liza Minelli, a senior citizen who can still high kick it like she's 45 years old thanks to new hips.
Anyhoo, we digress yet again. Your Mama has yet to locate a listing for the Devlin Drive property, but records and reports indicate that there are 5 bedrooms and 7 bathrooms in the 5,411 square foot house (some reports say 6,500 square feet) as well as living and dining rooms, a screening lounge with wet bar, a 25 foot waterfall, and unobstructed views. Your Mama located photos on the designer's website that reveal that Mister Hermann did what he always does to houses in the Hollywood Hills, which is transform them into sleek and sexy celebrity style residences with textured palettes of taupe, mushroom, brown and beige.

We've got a tufted wall of mushroom colored velvet in the media area, a fireplace surround that appears to be made of brushed aluminum (or some other metal), a Carrara marble clad master bathroom, acres of shag rugs, a kitchen straight out of an Italian design magazine, lots of down filled leather furniture in the living room, a custom fitted closet and a dark bottomed swimming pool sunk into the large terrace that overlooks the twinkling lights of Tinseltown below.

If the children have kept their thinking caps strapped on, they might also recall that Mister Hermann is the man responsible for the Nightingale Drive nest for which billionaire Larry Ellison recently paid a record breaking $12,600,000 to purchase as a gift to his lucky daughter Megan. Mister Hermann also did over the house immediately next door to Miss Megan's new crib that media mogul Byron Allen has been trying to unload for over a year.

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