Wednesday, January 14, 2009

More Mish Mash

Listen puppies, Your Mama hates to throw the mish-mash down twice in one week, but we still have a few nuggets and morsels that we need to get out of our inbox and off our voice mail.

First things first children, so let's all grab a snack and board the Britney Spears real estate crazy train right away this morning and get it over with. Two days ago it was widely rumored and reported that back in the saddle pop star Britney Spears is decamping from her home in a gated community above Beverly Hills called The Summit, CA to another gated community out in Calabasas, CA called The Oaks. These developers are just so dang clever and creative with their community names, aren't they?

Anyhoo, all gossip and rumor arrows pointed to Miz Spears (and presumably her daddy/conservator Jamie) fixin' to move into anewly built mansion called Chateau Suenos, which is a silly Franco-Spanish way of saying House of Dreams.

The 10,300+ square foot French Provincial/Tuscan Farmhouse/Spanish Hacienda style sprawler occupies a large raised lot in The Estates section of The Oaks, which for those of the children not familiar with The Oaks (and why would you be?) is essentially a gated community within a gated community. That means iffin any of you freako fans manage to get yer Saturns and Hyundais past the first set of (guarded) gates you'll quickly be thwarted by another set of gates designed to keep your peeping asses out of The Estates where other big name music types like Brad Wilk and Travis Barker also live.

Since our little discussion two days ago the ex-Mrs. Federline confirmed via a Twitter entry on her official blog that she took her two pop tots to see their new house, that they, "Loved it," and that she, "Can't wait to move in." So there you have it right from the horses mouth, or at least the horse's Twitter account.

As we mentioned in our previous discussion, in addition to being offered for sale at $8,990,000, Chateau Suenos was also available for lease at $19,000 per month, which is more than some people make in a year, but pocket change to a gal like Britney who apparently has more money to spend on her fickle real estate whims than she knows what to do with.

New reports say that the singing and dancing cash cow is leasing Chateau Suenos while she builds another house of her dreams nearby.

We can all breathe a heavy sigh of relief because according to an AP report in the Southern Ledger American Idol winner and 8-time Grammy nominated singer Fantasia Barrino will not lose her big ol' house in Charlotte, NC down the slippery slope of foreclosure

Phew! Your Mama knows y'all were on pins and needles about that.

Boxing's weirdest and most outspoken promoter Don King has recently listed his Manalapan, FL compound for sale with an asking price of $27,500,000. Property records and reports show that Mister King and his wifey Henrietta purchased the two properties in 1999 for a total of $14,300,000.

The nearly three acre compound stretches from the Atlantic Ocean to the Intracoastal Waterway and includes two adjacent mansions, one which he used as is private residence and another that he used as a guest house. The Mediterranean style main house is reported to have seven bedrooms, nine bathrooms, garaging for three cars, a swimming pool and a courtyard with a bridge over a goldfish pond. The guest house is reported to have four bedrooms, nine bathrooms, a second swimming pool and a damn ice cream parlor. The children will note that Mister King's kompound has at least 18 terlits, which means considerable expense will be incurred by the owner having a gurl who does nuthin' but scrub terlits day in and day out.

The properties include two docks for yachts on the Intracoastal Waterway and a long stretch of sugar sand beach on the Atlantic that is accessed via a retractable staircase. Fancy.

Mister King, who made mountains of money promoting fights for folks like Muhammad Ali and that poor, got banged in the head one too many times Mike Tyson, told the folks at The Wall Street Journal that his decision to sell is not financially motivated but because at 77 years old, "walking from house to house has become inconvenient" and that he's going to "going to move to wherever I can find a nice little cozy, $10-to-$5-million house."

Reports and property records show Mister King also owns a couple of casas in Las Vegas, NV, an 80-acre training camp in Cleveland, OH and another training camp in Fort Pierce, FL.

Ugly Betty brace face America Ferrera has recently listed the Los Angeles house she purchased last year just before she received word that production for her hit boob-toob program was shifting to New York City.

Records and reports show that Miss Ferrera, who of course does not have a mouthful of metal in real life, scooped up the 3 bedroom and 3.5 bathroom house on Rodgerton Drive in the Beachwood Canyon area in April of 2008 for $1,415,000. It's unclear to Your Mama whether Miss Ferrera ever occupied the house or not.

Listing information indicates the 3,523 square foot house is fully wired for sound and includes a fiberglass swimming pool and spa wedged into the small back yard, a huge two car garage and a master suite with private terrace and adjacent office space.

Your Mama would like to note that Miss Ferrera rather wisely painted over the pukey mural that was painted on the wall behind the swimming pool when she bought the house. Although we can not confirm it, this appears to be the only change that was made to the property.

Listing information reveals the house is currently listed at $1,685,000, a number our bejeweled abacus shows is $270,000 more than she paid for the property just nine months ago. We're certain some of the children will have something to say about that.

Hedge fund scoundrel Bernard Madoff may not be a celebrity in the ordinary sense of the word but (allegedly) bilking friends and family out of $50,000,000,000 sorta puts him in the category of infamy, don't it?

It's now being revealed that Mister Madoff and his wife, who prop records show own and maintain a number of posh properties including an apartment on E. 64th Street New York City, a 5 bedroom and 7 bathroom house on N. Lake Way in Palm Beach, FL and an ocean front house on Old Montauk Highway in Montauk, NY, also own a modest hideaway in the South of France they reportedly purchased six or seven years ago.

According to a report on, the Madoff's South of France vacation getaway is a small apartment located in the international jet-setter hot spot of Cap d'Antibes. Located in the Chateau des Pins development, the 1,300 square foot unit on the second floor of a white villa with a terra cotta tile roof reportedly includes just 3 bedrooms and overlooks the tennis courts and swimming pools of larger and more expensive homes down the slope and closer to the water.

Mister Madoff, who reportedly owns a large private plane that he owns, conveniently parks his appropriately named boat Bull just down the hill in the super swank harbor at Juan les Pins where some of the largest boats afloat dock when not being used by their billionaire owners.

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