Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Olivia Newton John's Malee-boo Retreat

SELLER: Olivia Newton John
LOCATION: Retreat Court, Malibu, CA
PRICE: $14,000,000
SIZE: 6482 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 6 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Located on a private cul de sac in prestigious Serra Retreat, this fabulous compound boasts a magnificent main home, pool, spa & 2 bedroom guest house. Expansive, beautifully maintained grounds surround the impressive Mediterranean home w/ high ceilings, spacious great room, huge master suite (2 bathrooms) media room, family room w/ bar, dining room, great cook's kitchen, additional bedroom suites...

YOUR MAMA NOTES: Thanks to a late night contact from Our Fairy Godmother in Malibu, Your Mama has learned that Grammy winning English-born/Australian bred singer, and every one's favorite Sandy, Olivia Newton John has put her Malee-boo mansion on the market for $14,000,000.

Listing information for the 1.28 acre property located way up in the exclusive guard gated Serra Retreat community reveals that the Mediterranean style house sprawls across 6,482 square feet all on one level. Good lawhd children, it must take six minutes or more to walk from one end of this place to the other so Your Mama just hopes that Miz Newton John will include her roller skates from Xanadu in the sale to help the new owner get from room to room efficiently. In addition to the 5 bedrooms and 6 bathrooms in the main house, including a master bedroom with dual bathrooms, a guest house provides another 2 bedrooms for staff, less favored house guests who stay too long, or adult children who refuse to get jobs and apartments of their own.

Property records show that Miz Newton John purchased this house in August of 2004 and not long before her long time boyfriend Patrick McDermott vanished without a trace in 2005. Records reveal that Miz Newton John paid $5,995,000 when she bought the house from action actor Charles Bronson's widowed wife Kim. Do the math puppies. That's right. Miz Newton John and her long time real estate agent appear to think that the property has more than doubled in value in the last three years. Hmm. Could it be?

Given that the wig wearing trashtastic poptartlet Britney Spears and the FedEx's former love shack next door sold recently to writer/director/producer Stephen Sommers (Van Helsing, The Mummy) for just $10,000,000, Your Mama thinks the current asking price might be a wee bit optimistic. Yes children, the Spears mansion was rumored to have been totally trashed and we're quite certain that Miz Newton John does not let her dogs crap on the carpet, leave dirty baby diapers lying around or, like we heard ka-razy Miz Spears did, have her wedding dress propped up on a dress form in the corner of her bedroom, a situation which would surely freak out most, if not all potential buyers. But still...it'll be interesting to see what happens to the price of this home.

Miz Newton John and Mister Sommers (and previously Mister Bronson and that Spears gurl) are not the only Hollywood types that call Retreat Court home. The other two properties on the cul de sac are both owned by five time married and fantastically rich Titanic director James Cameron, who we can only imagine was thrilled with the FedEx packed his Ferrari and decamped to Tarzana.

Anyhoo, at this point, the listing agent has not made any additional photos of the Newton John crib available so we really can't dig into the decor. However, Miz Newton John has been around Malee-boo long enough to witness the birth and meteoric rise of the Shabby Chic juggernaut, which of course started in Malee-boo, so we expect to find dozens of over stuffed white sofas, tall gilded candlesticks, a truck load of distressed furniture she bought from Miz Rachel Ashwell.

Your Mama doesn't know why Miz Newton John is vacating the premises up in the Serra Retreat. We can certainly imagine she might want to downsize, get out of a fire prone area or move back down to an ocean front property. Whatever the case, Your Mama wishes Miz Newton John all the happiness in the world in her new home and all the luck in the world unloading this place at it's current asking a price.

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